DBT started with a rumble this evening. We always spend the first couple of minutes of group in silent meditation "following our breaths." I hate it. A lot. Forcing me to spend a few quiet minutes with my thoughts is more like a form of torture for me.
Tonight started off the same... my thoughts were racing, preoccupied with how much I hated meditation, how much I had to do when I got home, how busy and stressful the day had been, and a few thousand other thoughts. Especially packing. How much I Hate packing. Hate. It requires me to make decisions... why can't I make any decisions??! My pulse was racing.
And then we had an earthquake. It was only a 3.7 but it was centered less than 1km from where I was sitting. That's enough for the whole building to go shhh-aaake, shake-a, shake-a, shhh-shhhake.
And then, finally, my brain was distracted enough that it shut the hell up. I immediately calmed down and was able to relax. I guess it was a little reminder that all that crap buzzing around in my head wasn't really that important. Plate tectonics... that's important.
When I got home, I threw half my clothes in the biggest bag we own and called it a day. We're driving - I'm taking as much luggage as that rental SUV can hold. And toiletries... I'll deal with them tomorrow.
Postscript: I don't know how much blogging I'll be doing for the next week. I'm a little paranoid about blogging from my parents computer... In case I totally flake out and don't post at all, take care and have a safe and happy holiday. And enjoy the happiest day of the year... December 24th - Christmas eve, and my 32nd birthday!
1 comment:
woah! i didn't know about that earthquake. how cool (since it was little it can be cool, right?) and scary (because, well, it's still scary to me!).
i have blogged from my parents computer but only when i realized that i could erase the cache (so they wouldn't type in www.b and have windows fill in the rest of the address for them. i also erased the usernames and password from the computer too. it felt very stressful and also silly.
merry christmas! and happy birtnday!
Post a Comment