I had lots more stuff planned for today. None of it happened.
Mom got another massage but her back hurt her a lot for most of the day. When someone is in so much pain that they can't eat or make conversation the days get reeeeeal long.
Sigh.
Honestly though, this visit didn't feel all that different from most of her other visits. Most of the time she comes and takes over and runs her own agenda. No matter what I've planned, it always gets changed. And I wind up driving back and forth through town, trying to accomodate her.
I dunno.
At least it went better than her fateful visit four years ago. We got stuck in a traffic jam for (brace yourself) SIX HOURS. She was stuck in the backseat with the flu while my husband and I were trapped in the front, desperately trying not to breath any of her infected air. Did I mention I drive a teeny, tiny beetle? When we finally got out of traffic, we drove across the golden gate bridge and down the Highway 1 through some thick fog. "Oh my god, I can't see, we're all going to die!" she kept exclaiming even though I assured her I was very fammiliar with the highway. We were supposed to go into San Francisco for a fancy dinner but we had to cancel it. Why the fancy dinner... ? Oh, it was just our first wedding anniversary. No biggie. That's just the weekend she decided to come.
Sigh.
1 comment:
the mother-daughter dance is so....predictable. and yet i personally am always suprised and frustrated when i find my mom and i doing that. we both do our own thing while pretending we are trying to make the other person's life happier/easier/better - and we annoy the shit out of each in the process. then we go away and feel bad for being selfish or for how it didn't go well. then one of us calls the other, vowing to be good (or at least to get through it unscathed), and we start all over again with the dancing.
the back pain sort of complicates everything, you know? you have to be sympathetic (well, you don't HAVE to be, but it certainly is easier) and then you feel maybe less justified in being annoyed or indignant at blatant selfish behavior. i'm expecting essentially the same crud to go down in the hospital monday when my mom has surgery. there's no where i'd rather not be more than that tiny little room.
i'm sorry your mom feels icky, i'm sorry all your planning went up in smoke and i'm sorry that you and your mom are still...you and your mom. i love you and if i was visiting i would LOVE to do all those thing you planned. can i do those when i have a visit back that way?
Post a Comment